Why do you allow yourself to continue to be so distracted from your dreams?
This morning I could have sworn that technology was literally trying to tell me something, that actually maybe I’m really not supposed to be doing video at all, seeing as it took me five attempts to actually record the thing and that wasn’t me even being perfectionist or anything (HA, those of you that know me), my phone just kept crashing!
And then when I finally got around to recording the thing and I was super happy with it – THEN it crashed again and deleted the whole thing and no word of a lie here even just writing those things my desktop just crashed too!
I mean – I know. Mercury and all 😉
So then that happened, and then I recorded another video, by which point I’d just been in tears about missing my family over in New Zealand, and probably from a touch of jet lag too and trying to keep the kids balanced while in the middle of all this crazy travel
So I then recorded an entirely different video about the reality of travel, and then halfway through the kids and rob walked in and I totally lost my flow and then that also got deleted!
And then I realised I’d messaged one of my clients about moving her appointment forward due to time zone calendar errors, and then realised I was a day early anyway and didn’t even need to worry about it.
Like, seriously!? Ever feel like the Universe is trying to tell you something!? And for a millisecond I thought well, actually – it probably is! No more video for me! Accompanied by a toss of the hair and my 5th coffee of the day. One of those things is a lie 😉
But what it was no doubt trying to say was
Get back in the chair, and do the work.
And I had an almost identical chat with my client this morning who told me that she ‘can’t’ make sales daily because she has a child.
And what I said really, was the message meant for me, like always.
Having a child is NOT an excuse for not following the callings of your soul. I’m not even sorry about that, it’s just not a legitimate reason!
And neither is technology.
In fact there is no legitimate reason that time, money, freedom, whatever challenge it is you’re facing can not EXPAND and bow down to you, is there?
Because if you truly believe you are a CREATOR – are you truly limiting yourself to creating ONLY ONE THING?
Why can you create art
Or a message
Or movement in your body even, that most basic of things that most of us are lucky enough to have
Yet you can’t, for whatever reason, create and shape the rest of the world exactly as you want it to be?!
Of course, you’ll tell me that LEGITIMATELY the world just doesn’t work in that way –
Well of course then it won’t, will it?
Of course time will NOT expand for you, and neither will money, and neither will your art and your purpose really, if you keep on telling the world it cannot be so!
Really if you are a creator, artist, visionary, dreamer, someone indeed stepping out as the star of their very own show, this incredible gift of LIFE in full colour, full glory,
Why, oh why, are you letting something so SMALL, so mortal and so unimportant you won’t even remember it a year from now or even a month or week from now
Dictate your choices, dictate your purpose, dictate how you show up or flow or LIVE your purpose?
I was thinking about this as I walked to the bathroom,
How frustrated and restless and irritated I felt and I couldn’t quite put my finger on why, I was even willing Rob to hurry up and take the girls to the beach this morning,
like even sitting with other people was literally like ants crawling on my skin and YES this is my beautiful children, my earthlings and soullings that I’d literally die for –
Willing them away, to the beach – and WHY
Because of course
I was allowing every single distraction under the sun to surround me
Allowing everything possible to take my time
And even have been sidetracked with VIDEO of late, which sure is fun for me, sure actually, I’m enjoying playing with it and learning more, and experimenting and creating and actually for me the question and calling to do and share more of my message in the world IS pulsing through me right now –
It will NEVER replace this for me.
This, words running on to the page from my fingers, the way that technology simply cannot and will not ever replace this flow, this freedom I feel when it doesn’t matter what the world has to say to me today, it can’t break through anyway, I’m so far away when I’m writing like the faraway tree has come and taken me to another land and gone, spinning off elsewhere,
AND I LET EVERYTHING ELSE STOP ME FROM SITTING HERE, DOING THIS.
This, your flow, your creative genius, this outpouring of collective consciousness and soul joy and all of it – it must come out.
Because otherwise you become the brittle woman
Message eating you alive from the inside
Fury at your own ability to create, speak the truth of what REALLY matters,
And of course then
The reason this frustration exists is and seems to continue to devour you no matter how much money you receive or dream clients you get signing up or art you adorn your own body with,
trying so desperately to share what’s IN, on the OUT whether that’s your clothing or your latest tattoo >
Is not because tech breaking down
Or your kids interrupting your flow
Or because you simply ‘don’t have time’.
But because you are allowing every single excuse under the sun
‘waaah I just want to PLAY’
‘waaaaah clients / local people / competition / algo’
Whatever poison is lacing your veins this day
To STOP you from bursting out your true
The beautiful brand of YOU
into the world.
That frustration you feel
That simmering resentment isn’t really at the hand life dealt, is it?
It’s at yourself
Burning at yourself
And so this peculiar cycle of burning begins where
You constantly feel frustrated that for some reason you aren’t ‘there’ yet or receiving what you demand
And so you blame the world
And yet at the same time you know it’s all you
But you don’t know ‘how’
So you again look out at the world for what is going wrong
Rather than assuming ownership for the power you’ve had all along!
So when is it then
You get to stop blaming technology, the market, lack of clients, your husband, or whatever it is-
And instead pick up the looking glass
And see that you ARE a creator and if you assume your identity as such
This therefore must mean you have creative ownership of TIME, and MONEY, yes?
Creation is creation!
but of course to gain ownership of those things
Not only do you have to ASSUME it
And know and trust in your heart is simply IS this way
But also to take ownership of identity as creator, LEADER,
Means you also have to decide to do the work of creation.
Stop bottling the stuff inside of you that you know is real
Masking yourself to the world
Let it all out
And yes IN that place IS alignment because alignment isn’t this glossy place of perfection for most of us
Again, it’s just another wrapper you can wear or discard as you choose
But you have to be willing to sit in the mess
The BLEAKNESS sometimes
Let alone the breaking technology and kids at your feet 24/7!
And create regardless.
The creation IS your soul, is your very breath, birthing life into the world
Art is living, and alive after all
And so is selling which is just another label, actually, for message-sharing
and so is marketing
And all the other things we THINK we have to label as ‘business’ when really
ALL are just a version of you sharing that innate ability as a bloody powerful messenger, dreamer, explorer, artist, healer, wanderer, and all of them AND as CREATOR and CO-CREATOR and channel for the energy that is sitting
Waiting for you to release it
And when you do you will explode and run like pink champagne over skin
And you’ll wonder what took you so long to get here, get to this place of fulfilment, of time freedom, of deep and utter fullness and JOY.
What excuses are you using today as for why you can’t show up as the magnificent creator that you are then? But more still – what does it even mean, to be a creator? Can you possibly hold the vision that you – NOT ‘mere’ you but the absolute magnificence of you – can be so powerful as creator as to suspend not just distraction, but time, even?
You are more powerful than you know –
but at some point, you can choose to know.
And then, the world will begin to unfurl for you.